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I've just spent the weekend in Salisbury with the Evil Harridan and Jude, at my parent's house. It was good to have a break, and to spend some time with my family. I spent time with my friends Louise and Daniel, mooched around the woods, and nearly (but for lack of cash) got my nipples pierced and my hair cut short.
The Evil Harridan thinks that it would be for the best if we were to spend a week without contact - no meeting, no e-mail, no phone calls. Apparently, she thinks that we're getting too serious, too quickly and she wants to cool off. I agree that a little space is a good thing - I was starting to get very irritated by the daily routine of work, MTV, sex and sleep - but a week's really gonna hurt. And of course, if she's still feeling uneasy at the end of it, then things could go from bad to worse...
I'm doing my best to make a positive situation out of this - I need to sort out my cicadian rhythm, spend some time with people I've been neglecting (Karo and Sandy, amongst others), and generally sort my life out - I've got some unpaid bills from Manchester, a server / router to assemble for my housemates, and the DJ problems at The Morpheus Project to sort out. This is a good opportunity for that.
I don't want to throw in the towel on this relationship without trying my best to make it work, but somewhere inside my head, a little voice is telling me not to bother. It doesn't help that one of my family really took badly to the Harridan, and is under the impression that she's using me, doesn't care about me and just wants me for sex and attention. Of course, that opinion is compounded by my efforts to give her more space, which basically lead to me spending next to no time with Louise and Daniel, because Lenore was enjoying their company so much.
But still, I remember the cuddles, the kisses, and the affection she shows me when she thinks that nobody is looking. She's got genuine concerns and reasons not to get too involved at this stage, and I can appreciate her point of view... I'm just not entirely sure how compatiable our separate desires for our relationship will turn out to be.
Currently, my net connectivity is fux0red, so I can't actually upload this entry. You might well see it tomorrow - unless I decide to wait the week out in case the Evil Harridan is reading.
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